Lessons From Infants

Good Morning!

Every week is filled with new lessons to learn...

That is just one of the elements that creates a successful and fulfilled life...

I realized that this week...that among my my greatest teachers and mentors...the ones that stand out...

...are infants!

Yes...I learn so much from them!

It isn't so because they are pure and innocent...

In actuality...the exact opposite is true...

They are helpless...but they are programmed to be the epitome of selfishness!

It is not that I aspire to that end...in fact I strive to be the exact opposite...

But within the self-serving behaviors...there are things that we can learn!

The one thing that stands out as I write today...is the ability to communicate without words!

Their helplessness actuality "forces" the listener to work diligently to figure out exactly what they are trying to tell us!

"If the kid could only talk...it would be so much easier...

...but...I'll figure it out..."

Every parent has said that phrase!

Why?

Commitment and loyalty drives an individual to do so...

After words can be spoken to each other...the effort to truly understand wanes...HOW SAD!

There is a song that I like...and a line in it goes...

"You say it best...when you say nothing at all..."

We tend to over-talk...and under-communicate!

Life and our needs are not that complex...yet we assume that we have spoken clearly and that the messages are heard!

"Except that you become like little children..."  is an interesting concept that takes on some interesting challenges for us!

Try communicating messages without words...written or spoken...

This is a aspect of humankind that is much needed and yet so under-developed...

It is an exercise that should be constantly honed by those who strive to be effective and efficient!

People can get the message (the spoken or written words) and they can refuse it...but if they get the meaning...they'll never lose it...

If you wish to be effective in this world...look for lessons learned...

Discipline yourself and practice...

Just because it is only used by infants...doesn't mean that when you are an adult...you discard it...in fact this may be something that we should never grow out of...

Success requires clear communication...

Whether the message is...

I need help...or...

I want to help...

It needs to be understood...

Although this is written...I do hope that you get the message!

Have a wonderful weekend!

Pura Vida!

Leaders have no Secrets!

Good Morning!

I know that this week has been eventful for you!

Why?

Because you have grasped the importance of being a master of your events...

You'll remember...

If one is not experiencing the events that they envision...then they have abdicated their control or simply surrendered to fate...

Either of those situations are not part of your character...

That is why I know that you have had an eventful day...

My latest Rave!

In the "Secret" there is a thing called the "law of attraction."

There are two things I despise about the prior sentence...

The first is the word "Secret" (we'll address this later)...and...

The "LAW of attraction" itself...

The truth is...there is no law of attraction!  At bare minimum...it is a law of acceptance...

Let me explain this controversial position...

The "Law of Attraction" is a surrogate explanation for something much more fundamental...

That fundamental concept is simply the human right of choice...

We do not attract "good" things or "bad" things...we choose them!

Apart from cause and effect...which is a subject that I addressed in an earlier posting...

Life hands us these things almost randomly...

When we are approached by them...we choose which ones we allow to affect us...

Think about this...

There are things that you love and hate...and...

...there are things you choose to be indifferent to and simply ignore...

There is no SECRET LAW that says...how we think attracts more good situations or greater riches...

The real law says that it is how we think and what we choose determines what situations we allow to control us or reward us...

It is CHOICE...PLAIN AND SIMPLE!

OK...I have ranted enough about this...my advice is that you consider the truth when you start believing that rewards will come to you without anything other than thought...In my book...it is like participating in the powerball lottery...

The world operates on an energy principal...you get back from the world a portion of the energy that you expend...

This energy (your actions and efforts) are the currency with which you purchase your dreams and goals...

OK...

On to the thing that really bugs me...

The Secrets...

In an email that I received from a friend the other day...they asked for me to share my "secrets" of leadership...

As I thought through my reply...it suddenly hit me...

Leaders do not have secrets...they have answers...and advice and suggestions...

If a leader has secrets...they are not a leader!

The word "secret" is an interesting word...at the foundational level...it reeks of exclusivity...

It conveys a sense that someone does not deserve or have a right to the information...

It is a word that promotes prejudice!

I do not like that...

The word "secret" has become a marketing word...

People love secrets!

They love being privy to information that few have!

This gives them an advantage over the rest of the world...

In my book...this is not the way a real leader should act...

Keep a secret...and use it to hurt others...yes hurt!

Why?  If another person could benefit from the information...and it is withheld from them...that person has been hurt!  And the person withholding the information has hurt them...

Leaders do not intentionally hurt others...do they?

Leaders have advice...answers...suggestions and recommendations...

Leaders freely share...because their success is totally dependent upon the success of the whole...

Secrets promote selfishness...

Leaders can not be selfish...

You can judge a true leader by the level of selflessness they exhibit...

Leadership and secrets is an oxymoron...

Those two words together is like saying a "honest liar."

So...what did my reply contain...

It said...

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WOW!

I am honored that you would think that I possess some secrets to leadership...I do not have any secrets...in fact that is one of the foundational tenets that I adhere to in my leadership style.  A leader first seeks to provide answers and directions...these answers and guidance spring from themselves and their knowledge and experience...or...

They go and get the answers and direction...and freely share it...

There are no secrets in leadership...if someone claims to have a secret...they have put themselves above you...

In fact...the secret to being a great leader...is to have no secrets!

I have never found a true leader that truly believes they must possess some secret to success...

I have however worked for and observed many leaders that did think they were above (better than) the people that they worked with...and they kept secrets...and destroyed many people during their career...

My first piece of leadership advice...have no secrets...be open and honest...

If something has to be kept secret...you have to wonder about the very nature of the information that you possess...

Generally things that have to be kept out of reach of others...are poison and detrimental!

Said another way...If you have to keep it out of reach of people (children)...the "Secret" that you possess may not be something you wish to handle either!

And that my friend is my second bit of advice...

As always...I am always here to give you answers...or help you find them...

That is just me!

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Enough Said!

Have a wonderful weekend and an eventful upcoming week!

Put energy and passion into what you do...

If you do not see the efforts that you are working worth your effort and passion...seek other opportunities...

SERIOUSLY...seek other opportunities!

Life is too short to be wasting your time on meaningless events!

Vivamos la Vida Pura y vamos para el todo!

Social Responsibility and Charity

Good Morning!


I hope that you had a fulfilling week...


I sure did...then I realized that it could have been even more fulfilling...


Have you ever felt that way?


Like something was missing?


That was the topic of a conversation that I had this week...and it changed me!


I was talking with a friend about the many charitable organizations that are making a difference in this world!


And that we should and could be making the same relative impacts on our worlds...perhaps that empty feeling was coming from the fact that we were leaving an important aspect of our lives undone...


Then I reflected on something I saw this past weekend...


I was touched by an 84 year old man who has been on a crusade for the past 60 years raising millions of dollars to help his kids...Jerry's kids...yes Jerry Lewis...84 years old and 60 years into his MDA telethon!


Did you know that when he started...he was 24 years old...and the kids diagnosed with MD hoped to live into the double digits...yes 10, 11, 12!


60 years later...thanks to the funding that his telethons provided to research...kids diagnosed with MD live into their mid to late 20's!  He and his charity has doubled their life expectancy!


You could say that Jerry has changed their lives!


He would disagree...


The kids with MD have changed his life!


That is why he keeps doing it!


That is the secret of charity!


And Social Responsibility...


A lesson that we need to learn...


Do not set out to change the lives of others...


Go out and be willing to be changed and you'll attack your cause with all of the fervor that has kept Jerry going after a cure for MD for the last 60 years!


Let me say it again...do not go out thinking that you are going to change the lives of others...go out and look for a change in you!  Make differences in the lives of others and then look at what it does to you...


You haven't fully grasped this important lesson in life...until you understand that the most important thing that happens when you help someone is not the change in them but the change in you...and it is a by-product and should not be the reason for doing something...but it is often the biggest thing that happens...it is paradoxical!


That was what my friend was missing...he was waiting until he was rich and had the luxury of time to make a difference...


I disagreed and it set him on edge...


If it is important...get after it...


If it can wait...then look for something else...because you haven't found it yet...and that may be where the empty feeling is coming from...


Let's expand on this thought just a bit...because the real lesson for today lies therein...


All of your work...whether charitable or professional or personal...should actually seek the same thing...


Do not seek to make change...but be courageous enough to be changed.  It is actually a terrifying thought...


Jump into everything that you do...with everything you have...knowing that you'll come out different for the experience...


If you go in guarded...you'll get nothing for the effort...


That is not a charitable contribution...nor is it professional commitment...or a personal one...


Contribute and commit...it is our real Social, Professional and Personal Responsibility...that is what a true leader does...


If you do that...you'll never feel empty...


You'll change!


And the change will drive you to a higher level...


Enough Said...


Vivamos la Vida Pura y vamos para el todo!

How am I doing on staying with a single topic?  Do you like this over multiple entries?  Drop me a note and let me know!  I miss hearing from you guys!  BTW...you can leave your comments directly below!

The Real Success Formula...

Good Morning!

Another great week full of challenges...for you and me!

I have received a significant amount of feedback from readers asking to keep to a single topic...

That will be hard for me to do...yet I will listen and try my best...

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The Real Success Formula

I have been thinking a lot about all of the pseudo-success coaches, religions, gurus and fanatics that are out there pushing their secrets of success...

When I was in my mind twenties, I bought a book that said that if you followed it to the letter you would be successful and achieve all of your dreams...

So I followed it to the letter and guess what?

I was no closer to achieving my dreams than before I started...

Was I deceived or cheated?

I don't believe so!

From that book and the exercise I learned the real secret of success...and how you can achieve all of your dreams!

It is an interesting secret...

Here is what I learned...

Even though I followed the book to the letter...there was always "things" that kept my achievements from becoming my successes!

It wasn't what I did...

or in fact...it wasn't what I didn't do...

There is no magic set of exercises that makes a person successful...or...

A set of incantations...

Or a special relationship with God...by following a specific sect!

It was...purely and simply that...

There was always a reason or two or three or more...for it not happening...

Like a delicate plant...success needs all of the right conditions...

Let's think about that for a moment...

You can plant the seeds...water it perfectly...but if the incorrect amount of light is not present or it is too cold or too hot...it isn't going to grow and bear fruit!

The conditions have to be perfect!

The same is true for success...

Success is about doing things...you have to work...but...

More important to success...is the taking away of the excuses for it not happening!

Why aren't you "living your dreams" today?

List out the reasons for your dreams not being real...your excuses...and

...these are the things you should be working on...

Examples include...

I am not a success because I need a PhD...then guess what...take that excuse away!

Get your degree...right?

I got a note from a friend the other day complaining that they have not yet achieved their goal of being a millionaire...

I wrote back and asked why?

And the list of reasons in their reply was astounding!

I suggested that he begins working diligently at taking away all of those reasons until he has no more excuses but to be successful!

His response was...that is too much work!

Therein lies the secret to success...it has as much to do about taking away the reasons for failure as it does with what you do...

There is no secret formula that provides success...that does not include work!

I take that back...there is one!  Lower your standard of success so low that you are satisfied with breathing!

Otherwise...Work!...Plant the seeds for success (however you define it) and then work diligently on eliminating every reason for them not to go into fruition!

Success is about working on the right things...but it is also about taking away every reason for failure until you have backed yourself into a corner and you no longer have any option but to be successful!

Find someone to complain to about your failures...as you do...listen to yourself...take detailed notes on every thing you complain about and every excuse for failure that you make...

Attack them and repeat that tactic...until you have no choice about success!

On a daily basis ask yourself..."Why am I not there yet?"

List it out and push forward...

Do not give yourself a chance to be a failure!

The outside world only momentarily lauds success...but failures go viral on YouTube!

If you think that the outside world is going to sincerely help you be successful...you are deceived!

They would rather see you fail...it is much more entertaining!

Do not give failure any reason to stand in your way of success...

Again...the secret of success is...taking away every reason for failure...

You'll have no other choice but to be successful!

Enough Said!

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Have a wonderfully long weekend!

I may have a special edition or two!

Remember my friends...

...y vamos para el todo!

Pura Vida!