Saturday, April 28, 2012

Success and Time in the Wilderness

Good Morning!

I bet that you didn't even notice that I stopped posting Weekend Updates for a while!

I didn't stop because I lost interest or didn't have things to write about...

Much to the contrary!

I have much to write about...it is my passion to share thoughts and observations that will help people become more successful...

It is all about "...making meaningful and significant positive differences in the lives of individuals and the performance of organizations..."

My mission!

It is so embedded in my being that many times during the day...I find myself saying it to someone!

It has become my standard of performance!

When I set about doing something...I actually take time to see if what I am doing aligns with that mission!

It may sound a little crazy...but I realize how important it is to craft your mission and then act consistently on it!

****************************************
My Personal Epiphany

Not long ago...I noticed that I was writing the same things (same topics) over and over...

I felt like a parent of children who were not listening!

It was frustrating...

I was sending messages and lessons and not receiving any feedback...

I didn't know if what I was writing about was making a difference...OR NOT!

Was I adding value to the world around me...or wasting peoples' time?

I had to assess my efforts!

Could they be better spent on other things?

I decided to stop and walk in the proverbial wilderness and look at my efforts from an outside view...

Perhaps that will allow me to assess the value in an unbiased fashion...

You know how difficult to see reality?

Especially when you are stuck in the middle!

***************************************
The Wilderness Experience

Although I do not believe that what I do counts as earth shattering...

I act to make a difference!

Yet there are many things that can be learned and leveraged into even the most menial efforts...

One day I realized that many of the great missions began with time in the wilderness!

Perhaps the wilderness time was an essential component of a mission's effectiveness...

I wanted to spend some time in the wilderness...and see what value it really adds to an effort!

***************************************
The Wilderness Experience as an input to an Effort

What is the wilderness?

In a VERY general sense...it is a separation from the comforts, safety and habits...

It is leaving life behind and walking into unknown territory...

It is usually a lonely experience...

It is a reduction of life to the critical needs...

Are you getting the picture?

Why do it?

When I look at it from the reductionist perspective...it provides an external (inward looking) view of  those things temporarily left behind...

***************************************
My Wilderness

On the day of "my wilderness" I decided that I needed to stop blogging...but not thinking!

I needed to step away from my blogs and and see....

1 - If anyone notices...

2 - Anyone who notices...care enough to ask "Why they stopped?"

3 - For those who asked "Why?" Find out what they are still looking for!

The sad thing was...from my perspective...no one noticed...so the next two questions were never asked!

***************************************
The Wilderness Decision

It is funny...those who enter the wilderness go there with questions...

When they come out...they have direction!

So while I was in the wilderness...what did I have to look for?

Answers to my question?

After some time in the wilderness...I realized that I didn't have to look outward to my readers...

But inward!

I needed to look into my heart!

I needed to evaluate my intent...

I needed to evaluate my mission and purpose...

I needed to know that my writing was part of my purpose and a part of the bigger picture...

It didn't matter what "they" thought...

What matters is what I knew...

What matters is that I believed that it matters...

That is what puts substance into a mission...

***************************************
The Mission Continues

I went into the wilderness with questions...

and exited it with determination!

It is what I am supposed to be doing...

The Blogs will continue!

There is a lesson to be learned in this relative to our pursuit of success...

No matter how clearly one sees their mission and goals...it pays to go into the wilderness and take time to look inward!

It is not what others think of what you are doing...

Determination comes from the inside and not the outside...

The wilderness is that first phase in every "effort of meaning" that provides the clarity of heart that makes it worth the effort when there is seemingly no value coming back...

Perhaps it is time to spend some time in the wilderness!

Pura Vida!



















Saturday, April 21, 2012

How intense should your passion be?

Good Morning!

A while back I was at a restaurant and a person sitting a few tables away suddenly grabbed their throat, with a look of terror...and violently thrashed around...

It was apparent that this person was choking...

Before I could react...a quick-thinking server raced up behind the person...and performed the Heimlich maneuver...displacing a piece of steak that was absolutely HUGE!

The dining room applauded the feat...

The person thanked the server...

The restaurant manager appeared on the scene...

and things quieted down...

A brief moment of terror and drama!

AND...I almost forgot about that incident!

**************************************
Something wouldn't leave me alone!

Periodically I would think about what I observed and wonder what lesson I could glean from that experience...

On a bike ride...(I actually call it "thinking on wheels")...it hit me!

It was the initial look on the choking person's face that I needed to understand...

As I thought...

The need for "air" is the single most important and basic item on Maslow's hierarchy of needs...

It all starts there!

We can live for a few days without water...even longer without food...but the time that we survive without air can be measured in minutes!

That is INTENSE!

When a person chokes...the terror and urgency elevates IMMEDIATELY...

People do not say to themselves..."I am busy right now...I'll take care of this inability to breath...later"

IT WAS THE FACE OF THE PERSON WHO WAS CHOKING...and the subsequent behavior that I needed to understand (which I did) and a potential application of this lesson to our lives...that was "eating at" me!

**************************************
Choking!

Of all of the "emergency" situations that we encounter...(and I hope that we don't) "choking" seems to be the most serious.

Although I am repeating myself...the need to change the situation is immediate...and critical!

All other things stop...until the situation is changed...

I have belabored this point...you get the picture!

We often claim and deceive ourselves that we have made our pursuit of a specific goal as "the highest priority" in our lives...

Think about what that means...we are saying that what we are doing is as important as breathing!

Yet when something happens...we simply put our pursuit on hold and address the other situation...then we go back to it...when it is convenient,,,

 Would you do the same...if you were choking?

Get real!  Life is not like that!

Life is dynamic and certain commitments require us to focus on different things at certain times...

Right?

I agree to a certain extent...

The problem lies not in the dynamics of life...but what we tell ourselves about our priorities...

If we CLAIM that our dreams are the most important thing in our lives and do not react to a disruption of our pursuits of our goals and dreams like we are choking...

Then...

We have deceived ourselves and the world around us!

I have always held that the hardest person to be honest with is yourself!

This is a place that where we unintentionally believe something that can ultimately become a incurable cancer in our life!

Priorities have to be fully understood and our reactions need to be absolutely consistent...

Take time to ask yourself..."If something comes up that interferes with my pursuit of my dream...will I drop everything to get back on my goal...as if I were choking or...will I simply put it on hold until I can get back to it?"

Get Real...and be HONEST with yourself...

How important is your dream?

Is it as important as breathing?

It is less important?

Stop believing that it is #1...if it is not...

Then...

Redefine your goals...and work accordingly!

Be honest with yourself and the messages that you are sending to the outside world!

It will change the way you work and your TRUE happiness in your pursuit of success!

Pura Vida!



Saturday, April 14, 2012

Reverence IS a CRITICAL Component of Success

Good Morning!

Last Sunday evening we built a fire in our "chiminea."

It was a cool night for Florida and a perfect opportunity to simply sit on the patio...take in the aroma of the fire and feel the warmth...When we can't go camping...for me it is the best next thing!

That simple fire with 4 pieces of wood took be back to another moment that affected my thinking and the way I look at life and nature...

I felt moved to share this with you...

*************************************
Setting the Stage

Whenever I had the opportunity, I would stop and visit a my friends that lived on a local Native American Reservation...

My presence was frequent enough that I did not seem or "feel out of place."

I felt welcomed...and...as I reflect on it...should have felt honored!

Enough of the background...

I was often invited to spend the evening and sit with them around a central fire...which by the way was a regular evening event reserved for the "inner circle."

I was told ahead of time to "keep my mouth shut" and take in the experience...

Which, believe it or not, I did!

I did not know what to expect...but it immediately became evident that everyone sat quietly around the fire...few things were said...and most often quietly and between two sitting next to each other with a short phrase and a nod confirming what was said...

**************************************
The Fire, the Tree's Spirit  and its Warmth

As I quietly looked into last Sunday's fire I was taken back to that time and place...

It was much more quiet...

No traffic noise...no sirens...

No airliners flying overhead...

The hush of the evening was only interrupted by the intermittent crackles of the fire, the crickets, and an occasional owl "hoot" or nighthawk "buzz"...

On this particular evening I was one of the first to take a place around the fire..the oldest of the circle arrived sometime later and sat next to me...

He was an interesting person...from what I observed, he thought a lot...listened nearly as much and talked very little!  He was VERY different from the others that sat around the fire...

As the fire grew...the regular hush came over the circle and we sat and gazed into it...transfixed by the dancing flames...

After some time...he turned to me and in a voice just slightly above a whisper said...

(Note:  These are not his exact words...but how I remember them)

"The flames that you are watching is the spirit of the tree from which the wood has come...This tree has a strong spirit...it has for many years withstood wind and cold.  It was from its life...standing against the wind and cold and rain that it grew strong and held its place..."

"It did not get this spirit all at once...

"The tree's spirit grew over a long period of time...and the heat that you feel is that which it has kept given to it by he sun and the sky and the water and the earth..."

"The heat that you feel comes from everything that it lived through and now it shares that strong spirit with us..."

"You feel the heat from the flames...and may think that it lasts for only as long as the fire burns...that is not true...the tree's spirit it taken in by you and becomes a part of you..."

"We are quiet because we look on fires with reverence...for it is nature and this tree sharing its spirit with us..."

"We are quiet because we are listening and taking in as much of this spirit as we can..."

"...because the fire does not last for but an evening...and then this particular spirit is gone..."

"...we have but one chance to share that spirit...you should not ever miss a chance to share the spirit..."

"AND this my friend is also true with the warmth that we share with each other...during this time...we do so with reverence..."

"Unlike people like you...we build a small fire, sit closely and share each others' warmth..."

"You build BIG fires and sit far apart..."

"So often you keep the heat for yourself and do not do what nature longs for you to do!"

"I go so that you may share the warmth..."

I nodded without saying a word...as I had observed others did...and he stood up and left...

"I was a bit confused...turned to my friend and asked..."Does he think that he was keeping the heat from the fire from us?"

My friend smiled and explained," You totally missed the lesson!  He is the Elder.  He sat next to you this evening because he had something important to say to you...and he did!  You probably missed the fact that because of who is is...his presence keeps us quiet...

He said that he was leaving so that we could share the warmth...he did not say...the warmth of the fire...Did he?

He left so that we can talk and share...OUR WARMTH.  The warmth is not the heat from the fire...but the heat from each of our spirits..."

**************************************
Reverence and Success

I could NEVER look into a fire the same!

Whether in our "chiminea" or at a camp...or a bonfire...or even a charcoal grill...I still quiet my spirit and listen...

From that time to today...I look with reverence into the flames and absorb the spirit...

Those simple phrases, from a wise man, changed the way that I perceived the world around me...

Sharing the warmth of the flames that arise from the past experiences of the tree is special...

I think about what the tree went through to accumulate such heat...

My mind then moves to the understanding that we are not unlike the tree...

Our experience feeds our spirit...

Our good experiences and our bad experiences strengthens our spirit...

We grow strong...

And like the tree...our experiences serve no purpose if we simply keep them to ourselves, sit far apart and do not share "the warmth!"

Moreover...if we do not share...we are simply "left to rot" and our spirit is wasted!

It is important to sit closely and share the warmth of the fire within us...

It is important for us to share and learn from each other and continue to do so for future generations...

***************************************
Sharing and Success

The warmth that we share...is not a temporal event...AND as it is with the warmth of the campfire...it becomes part of us!

We need to take time out of the day...and share our warmth...with others...

It is a time of reverence and listening...and more important...Thinking and applying the warmth to your life...

As was shared with me long ago...build a small fire...sit closely and share the warmth of the spirit...

It is critical to your success...

Pura Vida...



  

Saturday, April 7, 2012

If I ONLY Would Win the Lottery...The things that I could do!

Good Morning!

The recent Mega-Millions hype brought up some very interesting discussions.  More often than not...I heard this phrase..."The things I would do if I won the lottery..."

Some time ago I heard myself saying the same thing...

At that point I stopped and assessed what I was saying...and looked to see if there was some real value (deeper) that I could derive from it!

Sure enough I found some...

In fact...the value of that statement was "hiding in plain sight!"

AND...it is HUGE!

*******************************************

Please forgive me...

In order to make sense of my logic...and ..."build suspense" (that is my literary license)...I have to take you through the whole series of thought...

*******************************************
The "If Only..." Thought is NOT Rare...

First - When we think of what we would do..."if only..." it does not have to be based in the lottery...we have many "if only" thoughts throughout our lives...I realized that I was no exception...I have thought..."if only" I had pursued different degrees...or made different choices or decisions...focused harder or not as hard...these are thoughts in retrospect...

Then there are those "if only" thoughts that are based in planning...better stated future oriented "if only's.".  "If only" or "when" I win the lottery most often fits into this class.  That is not to say...I look back and say..."20 years ago "if only" I won the lottery!

I know that this differentiation seems petty...but it was telling!  I needed to differentiate between the two to understand what I was really saying.  My thought paths diverged...

The question that I asked of myself was..."Where do I spend the majority of "if only" time?"

Was it focused on my past..."REGRETS"?

or...

Was it focused on future "PLANS and CONTINGENCIES"?

Enough of that...

Ask yourself that same question...and be honest with yourself...it sets the foundation for a deeper understanding of your inner drivers...

AND...

Do not dismay..."the paths" actually come back together toward our destination!

******************************************
The "If Only..." List is Important

At this point in my thoughts...I found that the two "If Only..." paths ran parallel!

In fact...as I waked each and looked over at the other...they appeared nearly identical!

OK...enough of the analogies!

I literally made two "If Only..." lists...

One list was based upon my past... e.g "If Only... I had done it differently..."

The other list was based on my future desires... e.g. "If Only... I win the lottery..."

What I discovered was that the two lists were nearly identical!

(Now does the parallel paths looking the same make sense?  Ha! Ha!)

This may not be the case for you...but what I found out about me...it that my retrospective "If Only's" and my perspective "If Only's" had the same outcomes in mind!

WOW...that woke me up!

With a few minor exceptions...what I wished I could have been doing in the present was the same as what I hoped to do in the future...

Are your "If Only" lists the same...or at least close to the same?

*******************************************
The Paths Converge Again!

There he goes with the "path" thing again!

I had to do it!

I could belabor the point and take your down to the many dead-ends that I encountered...

Instead I will run forward to the point where the paths converge and the insight(s) that I drew from this exercise of introspection...

Having discovered that the two lists were the same...I reviewed them for what they told me...

What I discovered was that the items were quite commendable!  I impressed even myself!

They were things worth aspiring towards!

Some were selfish...others were selfless...

Whether a regret or a hope...each was a good thing!

They were of value to myself, my family, the community AND sometimes the world itself!

WOW!

Things worth doing even though my past had not brought them to fruition in my present...

Perhaps that is why I had the "Hope" or "Perspective" list...

Good things for me to keep trying to accomplish...

So wishing, dreaming and hoping that I win the lottery is a good thing!

...or is it?

This is where it gets interesting...

If my hopes and dreams and aspirations hinge on the lottery...then the chances of them coming to fruition equals my chances of winning the lottery...1 in 175,000,000!

I do not want those odds of success...even if it is a dream!

I want better odds!  More lottery tickets?

NOT!

If the things that I aspire towards are of value...then it is important for me to find ways to make them happen...

The lottery is definitely the easy way out!

I took my lists and said...if doing "X" is important...then find a way to make it happen without millions of dollars...

This Epiphany of the Utterly Obvious changed the way I look at things...

It changed the way I attack my challenges...

It even changed many of my dreams and aspirations...

I have reduced my list to a critical few...

That in the event I win the lottery (yes I play 1 ticket every Wednesday and Saturday)...I can focus on those things that will optimize my efforts towards

...making meaningful and significant POSITIVE differences in the lives of individuals and the performance of organizations...

AND that I do it from the Keys!

PURA VIDA!