Scarred for Life

Good Morning!

I realized that I made it through the summer with the kids constantly around!

They don't hate me any more than they did at the beginning of the summer...and I...

OK...I admit it...feel a bit closer to them...

A few nights ago...a line from some kid on a reality show got me thinking about a common phase that we have all heard and many have said...She was talking about her mom and said that she had been "scarred for life..."

It was in reference to her mom's treatment of her...and some emotional damage that she was trying to blame on her...

Since I do not have the patience to listen to the whining...I left...

I do not really know if she was justified in saying that...for all I know...she was...but emotional scars are really an exception...(that is an entirely different subject)...what bothers me is that we have began using that phrase as a commonplace excuse...the truth is...it is rare...

Not being one to leave "stupid" well enough alone...

It got me thinking about scars...

When you hear the phrase "scarred for life" What meanings and feelings does it elicit?

From my perspective "Scarred for life" automatically has a negative connotation...and negative feelings associated with it...

As I really thought through scars...i realized...it shouldn't!

From both a physical and emotional perspective...There are bad scars that interfere with activity

BUT, there are scars that are the result of actually improving one's ability...surgical scars..for example...

There are some scars that are the result of removing some detrimental and perhaps even fatal malady...providing a "new lease on life..."  Like removing a malignant tumor, or a bone chip that interfered with range of motion, or a heart transplant, or a corneal transplant (giving sight)...I do not have to go any further...

Surgical scars from a repair or a removal...

I suddenly realized that "Scarred for life" can have two meanings...but we always think of "Scarred" from a bad perspective!

There are scars that will last a lifetime...Some are good and some are bad!  All scars are a sign of life...the good ones, a new life...or at least a new lease on life...

I actually know that there were some experiences that we (my kids and I) have, that scarred us for life...BUT... in the good way!

In fact...I am going to begin seeking those opportunities for me and for the ones I love to help them see the good scars on a daily basis!  and be thankful for them!

It sounds weird and mean...it is not meant to be!  It is love!

And as I think about that...sometimes tough love...

What is "tough love?"

I have thought about that one too...tough love is when the recipient is self serving and "I" centered and cares less about the other person...than themselves.

Guess what that means...?

When both people really care about each other, more than themselves...it isn't tough...and it leaves no scars or at most ones that aren't noticed!

So...

If I were to go through life unscathed and un-scarred...I probably haven't lived life to the fullest...if I am going to be scarred...may it be ones with meaning and that have made me a better person for having them!  AND...

If I am scarred and no one notices...I know that I am loved!

Enough Said!

**********************************


FACT - Beggars Can't be Choosers...

Now that is an interesting thought!

Most of the time, I have a "spin" on traditionally accepted axioms...this time...I think this time...I have to agree with it...

Let's start with the definition of what or who is a beggar...

Rather than belabor the point that can be easily made without a long logical dissertation...let's conclude...

A beggar is anyone who is not making a tangible contribution to those who support them...

It could be a microcosm as small as a couple's relationship, a family or as large as the world itself...

Moreover...If an individual expects a return larger than the contribution that they make to their world...they become a beggar!  Let me remind you that the contribution must be tangible.

Given the fact that the contribution is tangible, it falls into the realm of net value.  One can not do 3 bad (costly) things and 1 good thing of equal value and expect a return on their contribution.

Although one would like to be the judge of value...the truth is...the value judgement is external to the contributor,,,

Any compensation in return for the contribution that is of greater value than the contribution is a gift...

What they get can not be rightfully judged as inappropriate because it is gift...it can be rejected...but it can not be expected that it will be replaced...

Now we need to look at choice...

We wrongly believe that the freedom of choice is related to age!

Given the wisdom of this axiom...choice (choosing) is based upon contribution.

If an individual is not contributing...they do not have the right to choose!

In this context, self-determination is not a right...but compensation...it is earned...and at any given point it is a sum zero proposition...and can be lost through irresponsible behavior or lack of activity that adds value.

**********************************

A Toast...

Let's start today with a toast...

Not bread...

A public announcement of our commitment to changing ourselves for the better!

Let us...

Toast to change...

...and commitment...

...to never again listening to those voices, whether they be from your inside or from the outside...

...telling you, "that you can't!"

From this day forward, we'll listen to the whisper of Hope...

...that quiet voice...that can easily be blocked out by the din of doubt...

A salute to those of the past that refused to listen and to those who have today committed to ignoring doubt, past failures and feelings of inadequacies...

Stand-up...grab that drink defiantly...

...face the noise that is already sounding around you...

RAISE THAT DRINK AND JOIN WITH ME...COMMIT!

I will not listen to excuses...

I will listen to that faint voice that says...I can...and I will...

The next time I raise drink will be to celebrate yours and my achievements...

ENOUGH SAID!

***********************************


Remember...you are the heroes

It is the work of ordinary people doing extraordinary things...

It is sad that the extraordinary things in life have become "simply doing the right things"...

Make "doing right" commonplace

You are the heroes...remember that...

Enough Said!

************************************

Your efforts can be a thing of beauty...

AND a masterpiece...

There was once a prophet whose accuracy was unmatched...

He has attracted a rather large following, so large in fact that the king was threatened by it...

The king called 2 of his magicians into his presence and told them that they must discredit this prophet...

The magicians conspired...we will go to this prophet and ask for his prophecy...

I will hold a sparrow in my hand...and ask him if the sparrow is alive...

If he says the bird is dead, I will open my hand and the live bird will fly away...and he will be wrong...

If he says the bird is alive, I will crush it and drop it dead on the floor...and he'll be wrong...

Either way...he'll be discredited and we'll have fulfilled the king's wishes...

They traveled to the prophet and when it was their turn to stand in his presence they said...

"Oh Great Seer...I hold in my hand a bird"  "In your infinite wisdom and knowledge...Is it dead or alive?"

The prophet did not even look up and answered...

"It is in your hands"

and he turned and walked away...

For you my friends...

It too...is in your hands!

Have a great and glorious weekend and a week that surpasses that!

Pura Vida!